Christmas. I am shivering and it is not even cold. I need her to hold me in her arms right now and tell me that it is going to be all good.

There was one time at Tasneem's place in my first year, when her best friend had come over. At that point of time Tasneem and I were close friends. I have forgotten the name of the girl. So I asked her to introduce me to her. Tasneem was extremely reluctant. She tried very hard to make me go away before she arrives. I was not able to understand her behaviour. Anyways, I hung about since my flight was not leaving for another 3 hours. I met her friend and we talked for a very short while. When she left, I asked Tasneem why was she reluctant to introduce me to her friend. She said, " I don't like to share friends. I don't want to share you with her. I don't want to share her with you."

Years later, it has dawned upon me that I am not a sharing kind of person either. I never was. I never will be. I do not believe that sharing is good. I do not believe that by sharing your sadness, the sadness decreases. Nor do I believe that by sharing happiness, it increases. There are many people who believe in the contrary but I think I am entitled to my opinion. This might be an age old saying, but I seriously don't give a damn.

Above all, like Tasneem, I hate sharing people. I despise sharing friends. I don't do that. It irks me. It irks me beyond words. I feel like smashing and breaking up things. Very few people would understand this sentiment. Those who understand it, understand it very well.

Labels: Anger

Death note is by far the best anime I have ever seen. It is not only a beautiful story line but has been executed brilliantly. The anime features an exceedingly sharp high school student who is bored in life until he discovers a "Death Note". A "Death Note" is a notebook belonging to a Shinigami (Death God) used for killing humans. There are a number of rules regarding the usage of a Death Note. Kira, the protagonist, finds one such Death Note and he uses it to create a better world. The series portrays his character superbly. At some level I can truly associate myself with the character. Some people may call his activities evil but for me they are more of a necessity than evil. There is another character in the series called "L", who is the chief investigating officer. L and Kira are of the same age and they are very similar to each other when it comes to cognitive abilities. However, they differ on their concepts of justice. It is about a battle which is brilliantly fought between two similar opponents. L and Kira. A born genius versus groomed prodigy.

The background score is brilliant and the side characters too have great depth. I love every moment of it.

Labels: anime

Aditya Sudarshan was my 5th year. A brilliant student who could have aced anything he wanted to. When he left law a year back, we were shocked. He wanted to write. His book just came out. I feel that there is hope :)

Labels: hope

I saw dreams that no one could have seen and threw away anything that was not of use to me
Unyielding thoughts reside within my heart
We are still in the gorge of reality and idealism
Even if my feet get caught in the shackles of sacrifice
My overflowing urges cannot be repressed
My hearts yearning is too strong
'Lies' 'fear' 'ostentation' 'grief' all kinds of negativity
I am not weak enough to be captured by them
A trickster who knows no solitude

Labels: anime

In the end, all I was left with were scraps. I collected them and put them in my pocket. Another hurdle lost. It was painful especially when I was left to fend for myself alone. Someone had taken their share and walked off. And I was left with scraps and I had to collect them all alone.

I can't even cry. All the tears have finished. Nothing left.

Labels: Numb, pain