I cant find the answer. I am running blind. My mother thinks I am on drugs. She has checked my room and keeps looking into my eyes. My father acknowldged as to there mught be something wrong with me. It felt good to make him understand as to partly what I was trying to say. He told me to stay young. I want to be young. I want to live as a 20 year old. I am not 40. I refuse to be 40. He is right. I dont talk to my parents much. But it did feel good talking to them. I took a lot during this time. I will love. However, I am not going to expect love like a 40 year old. I am going to be all right. I will laugh and be happy. It is necessary. It is what I should be doing. I should laugh more. I want to feel young. 

Labels: Introspect